1. Awkward Policeman Adventures

    me: is it 6:00 yet?
    friend: i KNOW!
    me: ugh I feel like I've been here for like 10 hours already
    me: ok how about now?
    friend: yes. leave. go. you are excused.
    me: yes!!! I'm gonna go tell my boss that you said it was time to go
    friend: they have to let you go. i'm the law
    me: yeah. remember that time when I fought you, as the law, but you, being the law, won?
    friend: that song was so confusing for me to sing. especially at a policeman's picnic.
    me: I'll bet cause you wanted to sing "and I won" ... but you couldn't ... cause the LAW won.
    friend: well, i didn't want to be rude to me
    me: yeah, I don't know why you keep going to those picnics. it's always really awkward.
    friend: yeah...
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[bAckwards muSings from a sliGhtly sideWays thinKer]

This blog is a series of short thoughts and essays named after my beta fish who sometimes has digestion problems that screw up his equilibrium in the water and cause him to float sideways at the top of his bowl, making me think that he's dead. But that's not what the blurbs are about, the blurbs are funny. Or something.
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